Facts to consider when getting a divorce

No one can prepare you for divorce, but starting the process with some knowledgeable about what to expect makes the experience less stressful and damaging on the children.

On top of the emotional ordeal of a divorce, you will also need to understand the legal process, which can be overwhelming for anyone unfamiliar with the laws and regulations of separation, which is where a divorce solicitor in London comes in.

Are you struggle to comprehend convoluted jargon? Are you not agreeing on the important things with your soon-to-be ex-spouse? From simplifying complicated legal jargon in layman’s terms to offering you sound legal representation if your divorce stands trial, a divorce solicitor in London will guide you through it all.

Below are a few things you should know before you go any further with your separation, which will help you through the emotional storm that is soon to follow.

Your goal should not be ‘winning’

No one wins in a divorce; it is an emotional time that you would want to end as quickly as possible.

You might win sole custody of the children, but will you be happy knowing that your children miss their other parent terribly? At the same time, you might not be granted the child custody you had expected for your offspring.

Also consider this; after a long and heated divorce that takes months to finalise, with traumatised children, a depleted bank account, and feeling defeated, the lines between ‘winner’ and ‘loser’ will blur.

Think all your decisions through

Feeling emotional and spiteful towards your ex might prevent you from thinking and acting logically.

Have you thought through the big decisions? Or are you merely being impulsive and reactive? It is possible that you will have regrets later on when the dust has settled.

Put the children first

All decisions must be made in the best interests of the children, which might not be favourable to you because they may end up spending more time with your spouse than you.

But remember that the two of you are getting divorced and uprooting their lives. They play an innocent part in your divorce, so try to keep their lives as stable as possible despite this significant change.

Settling a divorce in court should your last choice

Not your first. Consider alternatives to court like collaborative divorce or mediation if you and your estranged spouse fight and struggle coming to decisions.

Collaborative divorce entails hiring lawyers and sitting down in face-to-face scenarios to discuss each aspect of the divorce – from children to dividing assets. Mental health professionals and financial advisors should also form part of your divorce team.

Mediation is a hugely successful communication tool that involves three parties: you, your partner and an impartial third person who facilitates the meeting and steers the conversation. The said person will help you and your spouse focus on the critical decisions by guiding the discussions in another direction if the two of you lose focus and start bickering. Decoupling is a complicated process, both emotionally, legally and financially. Do all the research you can and make use of the legal services available to you.

Apurva Thakur

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